Tokai's training regime; an old stinking highschool gym mat as a analogy, or why i love doing judo hungover.

So i ran today. I thought i was going to the gym; but apparently if you are over 77kgs you are supposed to alternate between running exercises and gym work every second day or so. it usually goes for an hour and starts at 7am. I found the place we were starting the run from; the judo students have their own dormitory relatively near to the supermarket and train station. The place is pretty easily recognizable, because of all the judo suits hanging out of the window. We all lined up, and bowed. Without a dyed bit of cloth around your waist it gets very unclear where you are supposed to position yourself for an organized bow, so i just tried to blend in the back as unobtrusively as possible.

We ran for maybe 40 minutes or so at a moderate pace. The scenery was kinda nice; we got out of town for a bit. There were what looked like rice fields; or some kind of grain anyway. Everyone doing the run was over 77kg, some maybe 40ks over. I found out that not being absolutely stacked like everyone else meant that i can run for longer than the average player seemed to be able to. People seemed to struggle to drag their guns around; i didn't have that problem. It turns out a Australian student diet has given me some physical advantages after all. It's a shame that being light and scrawny is useless in judo. Then we started doing some hill sprints. All the other students started kata garuma-ing each other up the hill. I didn't get a partner, so i sprinted up the hill instead maybe 5 or so times.

For the weights session; they turn you loose in the Tokai University gym. I was hoping for some kind of program; and maybe there was one, but it was properly beyond my level of Japanese to understand what it was. They have old suits you can chuck over chin up bars so you can work your arms and grips at the same time. Rocky montage! I just did some random things i could think of; i had no real idea what i was doing. Back in the day i was a member of Jetts. Jetts gyms are very sanitary; no risk. Here, no one seemed to bother using a towel for the equipment. There was a fair bit of sweat on everything. You could just walk up to a barbell; whack 100kgs on it, and lift it over your head if you could, or if you wanted to. I neither could or wanted to; I have no idea how honest my insurance policy is. I asked a friend back in Australia what i ought to do; he does judo; used to hammerthrow for Scotland at a highly competitive level, and is now a physiotherapist. His seems like the opinion to ask for if you want to learn how to throw people like they were metal projectiles.

I used to date a Singaporean; I asked him what the draft was like. He said it was really indulgent; he got to switch his brain off for a year. Everything he did for that time was decided by someone else, and he had no responsibility or mental burden for his actions; so long as they were the right ones. To me, training in a strict regimen, enforced by a large group seems much easier than doing it on your lonesome. I had some friends from judo ask if we could start doing some exercises in the park; i never got around to committing to it. With only two others, and no social pressure, there was no way i was going to get out of bed for it. Conversely, here i can drag myself out of bed after a heavy night of gin and tonics, and 3 hours sleep, for running drills (this is terrible for Japanese class; i do not recommend it).

Last week on the Friday; there was a bomb threat at my uni. All our classes were cancelled so we got to go back to the dormitory and begin the weekend. I turned up for judo but no one else was there. I asked the one guy that was there if classes were on; he said no; and that they were probably not on the next day either. I took this as my get-out-of-jail-free card. Me and a few friends from the dormitory went to Honatsugi for a nomihoudai. I thought it was going to be like a sizzler salad bar; except with beer taps. I was wrong, it was table service, not a "buffet" as i imagined. They kept serving us drinks after we payed the entrance charge. We proceeded to get nicely inebriated. I learnt that the korean word for "cheers" is "ganbe" (said like "gun bear" but without the A or the R). We ended up around our uni, drank some more. Went to a jazz bar; i asked them if they had Miles Davis; they did. Filthy jazz, cigarettes and Guiness; good for your soul. I asked them to play "Tempus Fugit" but they didn't have it; I really wish someone would cover it as a metal song. Went to bed around 5.

In the dormitory is a Canadian exchange student, with very tidy judo technique. He woke me up at 8 by putting a set of earphones next to my head. Took me a while to reboot into consciousness. Didn't really get what he said; must've been something along the lines of "get up you lazy bastard; Judo's on!" Had a somewhat delayed mental calculation.

1. Oh shit; Judo is on today.
2. Do i want to go?
3. There is no possible way i can get out of this.
4. Alright.

Chucked my shoes into the shoe box, and stumbled onto the mat. We started our rolls. I did the one where your head goes directly underneath you and you roll over it like a gymnast; my brain seemed to slosh around in my skull. There seemed to be a .5 second lag between what was going on and my mental recognition of it. I cracked a grin. This training was going to be interesting. One of the best competitions i have ever done, i was in this state after drinking vodka the night before. I wanted to forget how horrible my criminal assignment was.

They started randoori; the head teacher gave me a colored belt. I was a marked man; this meant that i was up for each randoori until it was time to take it off; you didn't get the option of resting after each round. Each belt change was usually around 25 minutes or so of consecutive randoori, with maybe 5 minute rounds. Out of sympathy; they put me into the area where the players with lower body weights were training. Everyone was bullet fast. Some of the really good players had landed their second attack on me by the time i had recognized the first. I had one advantage though; I got completely hammered the night before.

For years; at judo training, in one way or another, all the teachers have been telling me to relax while doing judo. I have never got the concept; i still don't. Why would i relax? I came here to learn how to throw people, and someone might throw me. Relaxation was something you did on the beach with a beer in your hand; you didn't relax in a dojo. I might land on my kneck. No one wants that. I wanted to train as hard as i could until it stopped being so hard.

In my experience if you can't chill out and take throws as a learning experience, you lock up in your mind. You can't face the possibility of being thrown; you avoid it at all costs. You do everything you can in training to prevent being thrown; because that's what judo is, right? Throwing someone else and not being thrown yourself? This attitude has led me to the most demoralizing low in judo i have ever been to.  Because I was afraid of a beating; my body locked up. I became stiff and rigid. Moving like this for even a few minutes is completely exhausting. And its also how you get injured. You get tired; do something stupid and end up paying for it. My shoulder still clicks on demand because i tried to break a fall from soto makikomi with a flat arm. And because I got this mental connection between pain and being thrown; it only spiraled downward and got worse; i locked up even tighter as i became more afraid of being thrown.

Indulge me, let me use some convoluted analogies. I'm sorry, but i'm having fun here. Imagine a nice, decent quality hardwood door. Its polished, its gleaming, it looks the part. You throw it off a 2 storey building; it shatters into matchsticks. Now imagine a filthy high school gym mat that's been used since the 80's in an underfunded institution. It stinks like urine; you get the impression that rats have eaten out the padding in the middle and started a nest inside it. You throw it off a 2 storey building; its fine, or at least you can't say that it is any worse than it was before. When i drink too much the night before; i am too worried about my stomach and sore head to really mind being thrown all that much. My body becomes floppy; and i bounce back up after throws.

Here's my second analogy. Imagine that same hardwood door. Imagine driving your shoulder through it; lets say you're a Tekken character or something. It lands in pieces on the floor. Now imagine the gym mat. It bends around your force, and wraps you up inside it. Whatever oily residue was staining the outside of it, now its all over you. You lose balance in it because it somehow tangled into your legs. Its a real pain in the arse getting out of it too; because the way the rats have eaten the inside of it; it  has too much give in it to be a gym mat anymore. It feels like being eaten by old carpet. Recently, i had two judo competitions. The first  was much better than the second one. My teacher graded me because of them. The first time; i drank 700 mls or so of vodka the night before, the 2nd time, i did the same thing to chase the same physical reaction. I moved like an animated sack full of dirty socks. Its not pretty to look at; but i can feel people trying to unbalance me when i am in this state. When i sleep well, don't drink and wake up fresh, i care so much about doing well that i end up mentally blocking myself from performing, lock up, and am so tense in my body i cannot feel my opponents intentions until after i have been thrown. After a hard nights drinking; my body doesn't seem to offer much resistance, and i can squish myself into positions i couldn't otherwise. Half jokingly, but not without sincerity; i asked my teacher if i ought to only wear my belt if i was hungover. He laughed, apparently it doesn't work that way. But without any hyperbole, i can truthfully tell you the quickest ippon i have ever done was when i was so hungover i was struggling to speak. I have never done anything comparable without alcohol.

So anyways; Tokai judo training. I have an uneven stumbling flow to my movements. One round i had, i managed to throw a guy maybe 6 or 7 times. Of course, he threw me many more times than that, and was at least 10kgs under me. But it was easily the best randoori i had done yet in japan. Another guy, i got him in a gravity surfing O soto gari. Ok, one last analogy, then i'm done. So i've heard that when NASA fling machinery to distant worlds; they have to calculate complicated trajectories to get them there. Its going to become painfully obvious that i know nothing of physics, but oh well. To get a probe from A to B, NASA uses the gravity of nearby planets to slingshot their probes around the outside orbit. When the probe arrives at its destination planet, it must enter at the right angle. The curve has to enter the atmosphere at an angle gentle enough for its heat shields to deal with the pressure. If the angle's too gentle however, it just ends up burning up because its cutting through more atmosphere than it needs to.

Back to reality. I got a swinging O soto gari on a pretty skilled player. I warped my body around the gravity of his attacks. When i saw the opening for my attack, i curved myself around and chased into him, at an angle gentle enough to avoid exploding on impact with his grip, but not so gentle as to end up with my back foot exposed and being dropped in tanae otoshi or something. I got him it. It wasn't pretty or anything, but I'm still patting myself on the back over it. Needless to say after that i probably didn't remain standing in that round for 5 consecutive seconds. But i feel that i can add to the number i can count on one hand; the number of times i have actually done judo in my life as opposed to some cheap imitation.

We finished up, and i struggled to find my shoes. I forgot where i put them; it took me some time to realize that i had brought different ones that i normally do. Today I went to judo, freshly rested, and probably did less than half as well. It sucks; i don't really want to become an alcoholic but at the same time it gets really tempting when i feel that a decent throw is just a night out away. One day i will figure out what this elusive "relax" means, but in the meantime i have other substitutes.